This is my first post on the blog. I don't know why, I read it all the time and I think about TMS all the time, but for some reason I couldn't figure out how to put anything into words. I've spent so much of the summer with you guys, and I've loved it. But next week I'll be home and I won't be working and I just don't know what to do with myself. I'm scared to see my friends because I know they're mad at me for not seeing them all summer. But whenever I'm with them we just talk about the same things we always talk about. The other day we were having a captains practice for soccer and a bunch of returning varsity players came and it was so fun. I forgot how much our team loved each other. Its funny because there is only one girl on the team that I really hang out with outside of the season, but last year she didn't play because she was at the Island School and I'm most nervous to have her there. I've always loved soccer season, and I think that's because its the only time of year when I don't constantly have to worry about where I'm going or what I'm going to do. I think it's the closest I can get to Mountain School. Then at the same time I feel like I might just use soccer season as another excuse not to see my friends. But then I don't know what to do when November rolls around. I don't know if its okay. I just don't know what to do with myself. Its not like I don't like them, I'm just so demotivated. I'm just really conflicted I guess and I haven't really been able to talk about it so I wanted to tell you guys. I'm so glad to have all of you in my life, you've all changed it.