For you guys

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_lyAtcTBU8

I'm not sure if the blog is dying or not, but I'm still going to post to it.

On Wednesday this week I'm having surgery on my lip I'm talking about my birthmark. It's kinda scary to think that part of what has defined me for so long will no longer be part of me after Wednesday. I don't really know how I feel about losing part of myself. I don't know if I define myself by it, or others define me by it. I don't know if my birthmark is what grounds me and helps me remember to be a good person. Granted the part that hurts will still be there, but supposedly my lip will be normal. I wonder if I'll be able to smile normally now.

I wish I knew what I was doing.

I had another "back at tms" dream last night. Except it wasnt with all of you, it was with my high school class and we were camping out in the carriage shed. it would have been more fun if it was you guys. thats all. much love